"Empathy gap" is holding back engaged, collaborative cultures

Source: HR Daily - (subscription service (18.07.2025)

Empathy has the power to transform hidden workplace resentment into constructive dialogue, but in many organisations it's still seen as a soft skill rather than a powerful leadership tool, a strategy consultant says.

"It is vital to understand that the role of a leader inherently involves making tough decisions, sometimes under pressure and with incomplete information. This is where empathy can help. By gathering more information, we can make better decisions," Empathic Consulting CEO Daniel Murray says in his new book, The Empathy Gap.

Based on his 18 years of experience consulting to corporate and not-for-profit organisations, Murray says empathetic leadership drives performance, fuels innovation, and unites teams.

"Leaders must navigate through the complex landscape of challenges, opportunities and responsibilities, making choices that often have far-reaching implications for many people.

"Avoiding decisions, or delaying them, can lead to stagnation, missed opportunities and even catastrophe," he says.

Giving the example of a restructuring scenario, Murray says empathetic decision-making would go beyond analysing financial reports and performance metrics, to engaging with employees to understand their fears, hopes and suggestions.

Empathetic leaders would "explore the impacts on customers, other partners and stakeholders", along with the impact the change will have on workplace culture, "and the benefits and risks should be mapped thoroughly to support the success of the change", he says.

"This approach may uncover hidden issues and opportunities," he says.

When it comes to communicating difficult decisions, "empathy helps deliver these challenging decisions more gracefully and with greater clarity as it supports the alignment of the decision drivers with the uncovered needs, desires and beliefs of the people we are communicating with", Murray says.

By genuinely understanding the various stakeholders involved, leaders can explain decisions in a way that mitigates feelings of resentment and fosters a culture of respect.

Daniel Murray

"This does not mean everyone will be delighted. It will also not eliminate conflict. It can, however, transform what can be hidden resentment or underground politics into more constructive dialogue, where differing viewpoints are acknowledged, explored and valued."

Reacting versus responding

Understanding the importance of empathy in decision making is one thing, but Murray acknowledges it can be difficult to utilise it during moments of stress.

"When we consider how we make decisions, it's easy to think of our interactions with the world as a simple combination of action and reaction," he says.

"However, this ignores the important step in between the stimulus and our response: we must interpret the situation."

He calls on leaders to consider their interpretation of situations through two lenses: "our mental models and our mood."

"When our emotions take hold, our focus of attention shrinks, and it is easy to miss things we would have otherwise been influenced by.

"We become more unconsciously reactive and seemingly less in control of our actions. While we might have mental models that would interpret the situation in a kind or generous way, that doesn't mean we will always access them. Our mood will shape where we place our attention and potentially which models will be used."

That's why it's so critical for leaders to be conscious of their emotions, particularly when the environment is stressful, Murray says.

When they feel anxious or notice emotions like anger and frustration coming to the surface, it's important for leaders bring their conscious awareness to these emotions, and consider, "Will this emotion be useful for me in this situation?"

Only then can they can consciously interpret all the information at hand, and choose to "respond" rather than "react", he says.